I can honestly say that I didn’t begin to fully love myself until I was 23 years old. Before then, I showed love through over extending myself, buying gifts and giving of myself intimately. I didn’t realize that the love I thought I was giving was to overcompensate for the lack of love I showed to myself. I looked good on the outside, but on the inside I struggled with “being good enough” and being accepted by my peers. I didn’t understand my value and allowed myself to be taken advantage of because I sought the love I didn’t have for myself.
I learned to love myself when I was alone. At 23 I moved into my own apartment with nothing but my 4-year-old son and a dream. I wanted to be independent! Little did I know, this new found independence would be the beginning of self-discovery and love. Many nights I sat at home alone with nothing but my thoughts. It was then that I was able to really understand the importance of quiet time with God. I fell in love with HIM and through HIM I was able to love myself.
To often we are consumed with the noise of the world that we are unable to be still. The noise of friendships, family, social media, significant others, children, work, school and life can consume every fiber of our being! There were times when I was so wrapped up in life that I couldn’t recognize myself when I was alone. How could I love someone I didn’t know?
When you’re alone your allowed to think, reflect, and enjoy your own company. It's important time for self-care and discovery. The next time you're home alone, get to know yourself. Don't "Go Live", don't call anyone to make plans - simply enjoy yourself. Pray, read, paint your nails, meditate, write in a journal, update your vision board...Indulge in the beauty of being you.